Thursday, July 12, 2012

Green Things Album Release!

I released my new album, Green Things, this past weekend! Give it a listen here and visit my website for more information!

Saturday, May 5, 2012

By the way...

It's a bit late, dear little blig-blog, and most of you probably already know this. BUT still. I have been called to serve in the Russia Novosibirsk Mission! It's above Kazakhstan and Mongolia and runs all the way up to the North Pole! (That is, as far as the land goes.)

Looks like this:

I report July 18th and I'm already learning the Russian alphabet. NUTS.


  1. Finish Pilgrim at Tinker Creek.
  2. Go on a big hike (hopefully in Utah?) with my family.
  3. Learn to make fresh bread by heart.
  4. Start Walden.
  5. Learn the Russian alphabet.
  6. Celebrate my mom as much as possible on Mother's Day.
  7. Visit the beach.
  8. Work on piano recordings for Green Things.
  9. Submit poetry to five publications.
  10. Turn twenty-one.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Hate-hardened heart, O heart of iron
iron is iron till it is rust.
There never was a war that was
not inward; I must
fight till I have conquered in myself what
causes war, but I would not believe it.
I inwardly did nothing.
O Iscariot-like crime!
Beauty is everlasting
and dust is for a time.

-Marianne Moore, from "In Distrust of Merits"

Saturday, April 14, 2012


Yeah, yeah, the month is half over, but this is my Aprilist.

  1. Open my mission call.
  2. Start recording Green Things.
  3. Watch my favorite movie with Chris.
  4. Go to Niels's mission farewell.
  5. Give 10 things to charity.
  6. Sing in church with Mom and Madelyn.
  7. Write Maddison a letter.
  8. Hang out with London friends.
  9. Make dinner two times.
  10. Keep my room clean.

Monday, April 9, 2012


My poem, "Eighth," was published in this month's issue of The Provo Orem Word, a literary arts magazine. Check it out on page 44.

Also, if you haven't heard, I'm going on a mission. (!)

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

The story is told that Sir Christopher Wren, the architect of the magnificent St. Paul's Cathedral in London, would often wander unrecognized through the structure, noting the progress being made during the many years of its construction. According to the story, he would sometimes ask a simple question of the workers he encountered: "What are you doing?" He received many replies, most of them like this: "I'm putting in my eight hours"; "I'm laying stones"; "I'm just keeping the boss off my back"; "I'm trying to feed and clothe my children"; "I'm putting in a window." One day he stopped a young man who had the least prestigious job on the whole project—carrying heavy loads of mortar to the stone masons. When he asked him the question, "What are you doing?" the young man stopped, smiled, and gesturing toward the heavens, declared, "I am helping God and Sir Christopher Wren build this beautiful cathedral."

Friday, March 9, 2012

The New Poetry Handbook

1 If a man understands a poem,
he shall have troubles.

2 If a man lives with a poem,
he shall die lonely.

3 If a man lives with two poems,
he shall be unfaithful to one.

4 If a man conceives of a poem,
he shall have one less child.

5 If a man conceives of two poems,
he shall have two children less.

6 If a man wears a crown on his head as he writes,
he shall be found out.

7 If a man wears no crown on his head as he writes,
he shall deceive no one but himself.

8 If a man gets angry at a poem,
he shall be scorned by men.

9 If a man continues to be angry at a poem,
he shall be scorned by women.

10 If a man publicly denounces poetry,
his shoes will fill with urine.

11 If a man gives up poetry for power,
he shall have lots of power.

12 If a man brags about his poems,
he shall be loved by fools.

13 If a man brags about his poems and loves fools,
he shall write no more.

14 If a man craves attention because of his poems,
he shall be like a jackass in moonlight.

15 If a man writes a poem and praises the poem of a fellow,
he shall have a beautiful mistress.

16 If a man writes a poem and praises the poem of a fellow overly,
he shall drive his mistress away.

17 If a man claims the poem of another,
his heart shall double in size.

18 If a man lets his poems go naked,
he shall fear death.

19 If a man fears death,
he shall be saved by his poems.

20 If a man does not fear death,
he may or may not be saved by his poems.

21 If a man finishes a poem,
he shall bathe in the blank wake of his passion
and be kissed by white paper.

-Mark Strand

Mary and the Auditor.

Mary: Pretend! Robert, I didn't just go out with you because of my taxes. I mean, look, the audit is over and I would still like to go out with you, so Robert I- I must like you!
Mr. Brandt: Alright, how about dinner, tonight?
Mary: Fine!
Mr. Brant: Fabulous! Well, okay- I can't, because I've got to work tonight!

Sunday, March 4, 2012

A Deep-Sworn Vow

Others because you did not keep
That deep-sworn vow have been friends of mine;
Yet always when I look death in the face,
When I clamber to the heights of sleep,
Or when I grow excited with wine,
Suddenly I meet your face.

-William Butler Yeats

Friday, March 2, 2012


  1. Swim in the sea.
  2. Give 20 things to charity. (8 down)
  3. Clean the kitchen for Mom.
  4. Edit 10 poems.
  5. Volunteer at Martha's Village and Kitchen.
  6. Visit Huntington Gardens.
  7. Play a show in the desert. (kind of?)
  8. Cook dinner three times.
  9. Draw something.
  10. Write about ideas more.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Strange Sea

Implausible fish bloom in the depths,
mercurial flowers light up the coast;
I know red and yellow, the other colors,—

but the sea, det granna granna havet, that’s most dangerous
                                                              to look at.
What name is there for the color that arouses
this thirst, which says,
the saga can happen, even to you—

-Edith Södergran
Translated from Swedish by Averill Curdy

I hung out in Provo last week.

It was fun. I don't take pictures.

Some things I did:

  • Baraka with Scott and Maddison.
  • Played music with Chris and Brooklynn.
  • Salt Flats with Parker and Maddison.
  • Les Femmes De Velour.
  • Village Inn.
  • Seviche with Collin and Jennifer.
  • Hung around Utah Lake and downtown Provo.
  • Sticky pudding with Pearl.
  • Tacos, rainbow jello, playing music, and Rocksmith with BoTW and the Hansens.
  • Walked to the Provo cemetery.
  • House hunting with the Mads.
  • Open Mic.
  • O Brother, Where Art Thou? with Chris, Maddison, and Niels.
  • Slept over at the Bennions.
  • Lunch at Pei Wei with Scott and Maddison.
  • Flew at night.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Monday, February 20, 2012


One time I said to Maddison, "Maybe I should just get bangs."

Then Maddison said, "Yeah, but then you'd be a songwriter with bangs."

She's right.

Kate Nash

Florence and the Machine

Laura Marling

P.S. I'm playing at Velour next Saturday. Does this mean I have to get on Facebook and invite people? Whether that's true or not, please come if you're around Provo. It's my first show there since last June and it's going to be gorgeous and I've even got friends playing with me.

Hello, this is where I live.

And where I grew up.


Thursday, February 16, 2012

Nobody thinks like me and that's okay!
The miracle is meeting someone's mind
that matches this one, even a little
like the green sliver on a blue and yellow venn diagram.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Day Resolution

I have come to terms with the fact
that after me-- and before-- you will always love girls
who can't write,
girls who dye their hardened hair,
girls who wear prints and colors collected from the mall,
girls with Tumblr accounts full of orphaned, untraceable JPGs and GIFs.

You will always love girls who can't write,
and I will only love boys who can't take pictures.

While I'm at it, I'll give up people with ears, too.
People with eyes, people with hair--
ceaselessly, these remind me of you.

I'll give up people with hands, people with bodies,
people who have parents and dogs,
people who walk on the street or breathe air.

From here on out I'll renounce people
with names, people with hometowns,
people with skin, or muscles, or organs;

I will only love people without thoughts,
people without language, without long-held opinions
or email accounts, or telephone numbers.

Starting today, I will only love people
who have never seen the sky,
who have never heard of love,
who have never watched the shutter of a camera flash

always capturing the awkward way my face moves
when I know I'm being photographed and
am terrified that you can tell I'm in love.

How I Joined Book on Tape Worm.

I just wrote a blog post about Valentine's Day and how I joined Book on Tape Worm on our blog. Read it here! I promise it's good.

Watch this!

Uh, guys, Samuel Beckett's Happy DaysWaiting for Godot, Endgame, and others are available in their entirety on YouTube. No ads! Let's get off Hulu and watch one of the classics.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Forgot to mention:

Inspired by my lists, two of my friends made bucket lists this month! Sweet.



I love these girls.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Some love poems I love.

Un Amor- Pablo Neruda

XVII- Pablo Neruda

Heart of the Woman- William Butler Yeats

Touched by an Angel- Maya Angelou

To My Dear and Loving Husband- Anne Bradstreet


My great-grandfather, Francis Raymon Brown, said some important stuff in a letter to my great-uncle Albert. Here's an excerpt:

"I want you to remember, when you have those moments of discouragement and doubt, that in any event the good life is best and do not commit any sins or take on any habits which will prevent your changing your mind when you get more information about the subject. I hope you will always feel free to seek only the truth and to seek it fearlessly and without favor. If you have any specific areas about the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ, as restored through the Prophet Joseph Smith, I hope you will keep track of these doubts, admit that they are doubts, and seek further knowledge and enlightenment on that subject and don’t discard the whole tree simply because you can’t yet understand a part of it."

I love the weighty matters that letters used to carry. I love that my grandfather felt inspired to write these things to Albert before he went to college for the first time. My grandma lets me read her old letters sometimes and once I found a beautiful letter to her future daughter, which she wrote on her wedding day. I feel so lucky to be part of this family and this tradition of writing.

Thursday, February 9, 2012


Reasons I should move to Provo:

1. Madeline M. had a dream I moved back and it made her happy.
2. Chris will buy me a fruit tart if I move.
3. I can live in a fun house and have dinner parties.
4. Book on Tape Worm.
5. Laura Bennion is leaving on a mission.

Reasons I should not move to Provo:

1. I love Maren unbelievably and I never want to leave her.
2. I like having no snow.
3. I like being without influences.
4. I finally have a job and I need to save up for next semester.
5. Real piano in the house.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

"People talked and behaved in front of him as if he did not exist, giving him the opportunity to observe and learn about the duplicity of human beings. He began to practice his skill at reading people's actions, and in that way discovered that words do not always correspond to intentions. He realized that bullies generally are easy to cow, that the loudest are the least sincere, that arrogance is a quality of the ignorant, and that flatterers tend to be vicious."

-Isabel Allende, Zorro

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

What is this? I don't care.

You took one like this. Don't say you didn't.

Happy birthday! I can listen to the album
I used to listen to with my ex
(the other one, the one that broke up
with me more than a year ago)
without feeling sick to my stomach.

Sunday, February 5, 2012


Yesterday Maren turned a year old. She danced to The Promised Land and cried all through Happy Birthday. These are some noises she makes.

I love her more than I know how to love.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Friday, February 3, 2012

Submitted to: Inscape, 491, 20x20, Irreantum, and The Provo Orem Word.

I'll probably submit to BlazeVOX, too. Geoffrey Gatza is the coolest editor I've never met.

If I make it into any of them, I'll let you know.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Lemon Ice

One thing I am terrific at is fixing a lemon ice.

I am good at thumbing a red brain freeze out of the roof of my mouth.
I sit at the kitchen counter alone,
Licking my chapped lips and the searing cuts of sour at the dry edges of my skin.
I’m good at the face that comes with lemon ice,
when a baby tastes sour for the first time,
Mouth squeezing into a tiny o, eyes squinting with distaste.

I like thinking about me having a lemon ice, too.
Not in my stretch cotton pants and shrunken T-shirt,
but lemon ice, evoking some white summer dress
and the east coast, so green.
A day in white shoes and wide-brimmed umbrellas, by the sea or a river,
And lemon ice, dainty and chill as the lace on our hats.

(Note: This was a little inspired by the work of Billy Collins.)


  1. Visit Huntington Gardens.
  2. Celebrate Maren's first birthday with a blanket fort.
  3. Finish my yearbook and mail it to Sam.
  4. Submit my application for Ecuador.
  5. Submit poetry to five publications.
  6. Make Valentines. 
  7. Start recording a new album.
  8. Volunteer at CVRM or Martha's Village at least once.
  9. Give 20 things to charity.
  10. Finish at least one abandoned song idea.

Things I've been thinking about:

How fast Maren learns new things.
Where pictures I took in fourth grade should go.
How much Paul is my favorite Beatle.

Monday, January 23, 2012

FHE with the Browns.

Today we went to a Mexican bakery (panadería) and then my brother burned a dictionary. I took some pictures.

From a letter:

PPS: Funny story about your music - All of us elders that serve in the Epsom Ward were in the car one day, and 'Somewhere' was playing in the background on shuffle. Elder Peach, my district leader, was talking about his teaching appointment that day, which was scheduled to take place at a train station in his area.

*music softly playing the background*
"Man, I'm starving," said Elder Peach. "Definitely should have packed lunch."

*music continues*
Elder Turner quipped, "Well, your investigator is Muslim, so won't he feed you?"

"Feed me at a train station? No way," said Elder Peach.

All burst into hysterical laughter.
The end.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Soneto LXXIX

Cuando yo muera quiero tus manos en mis ojos:
quiero la luz y el trigo de tus manos amadas
pasar una vez más sobre mí su frescura:
sentir la suavidad que cambió mi destino.

Quiero que vivas mientras yo, dormido, te espero,
quiero que tus oídos sigan oyendo el viento,
que huelas el aroma del mar que amamos juntos
y que sigas pisando la arena que pisamos.

Quiero que lo que amo siga vivo
y a ti te amé y canté sobre todas las cosas,
por eso sigue tú floreciendo, florida,

para que alcances todo lo que mi amor te ordena,
para que se pasee mi sombra por tu pelo,
para que así conozcan la razón de mi canto.

-Pablo Neruda

Translation here.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Eine Kleine Churchmusik

Will probably never forgive me for putting this on my blog. Good thing he never reads my blog.

I was in this ward just after he got transferred from it. HA.

Today I'm recording a bunch of hymns for some of my missionary friends, including but not limited to Sam, Mike, and (not pictured) the lovely Natalie. Surprisingly enough, my favorite one so far is "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus."

Anyway, if you're going on a mission or if you just like church music, they'll be available on SoundCloud in a few days. FO FREE.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Oh. Man.

Remember how I got a new iPod nano because the 1st generation one that my dad gave me got recalled? Well, I did, and I just discovered that it can do fairly high quality voice memos.

Do you know what this means?


Ways I waste time on the internet

Since not being on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr, Reddit, etc:

1. Lust over things I want to buy someday. (i.e. Nord Stage Piano)
2. Read entire Wikipedia articles, then click on Wikipedia articles linked to those articles and read those entire articles.
3. Bookmark cool YouTube or Vimeo videos that I find on blogs.
4. Read everything in my RSS Feed.
5. Look for decrepit pianos on Craigslist for my secret project.
6. Look for cool poems to mumble to myself.
7. Watch poetry slams.
8. Look at Ace Hotel's website and think about getting a job there.
9. Look at the secret poetry blog I have with my friends and wish the rest of them looked at it more.
10. Write blog posts.

The real point is that I don't spend that much time on the internet anymore. These things get boring fast.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Der Sandmann


I saw Swiss film The Sandman at the Palm Springs International Film Festival, and I got to talk to the director and one of the actresses afterward. If you're looking to watch something whimsical, surreal, funny, and thoughtful, see it.

I read Billy Collins's Ballistics. It is sidesplitting. Maybe you thought poetry collections were boring, but if they are, this is the exception. My sister Madelyn and I almost died laughing when I read her this poem.

(Ballistics is also poignant and incredibly well-worded. And Collins is a great reader. If you're into that sort of thing.)

I also checked out The Art of Eating In from the library and helped Madelyn start a paper on Edwin Arlington Robinson,  a poet who never stopped proposing to Emma Shepherd, even after she married his brother, and even after his brother died, and even after she refused him every time. Heartless Emma. Incorrigible Edwin.

I also picked some shards off the snowglobe Maren knocked over yesterday and ate cucumber slices with vinegar, which is probably my favorite snack as long as I've known me, and a lot of other minutia you might not be interested in, which might be fun to write about, but might also be writing too much.

Friday, January 13, 2012


I'm about to do my blogger-est blog post ever. Ready?

Things I did today:

  • applied for a job at Anthropologie.
  • visited Frank Sinatra and Sunny Bono's graves. (You thought I'd never do it. Finally crossing it off those bucket lists.)
  • Let my mom take pictures of my feet by them:
His grave says "The best is yet to come." Isn't that perfect?

Yes, I wore rolled corduroys and heels to the cemetery. Yes, the sun was that bright and golden today. Yes, I live in Southern California and I'm so obsessed with my sister I should just make this a premature Mormon mommy blog.

But I didn't wear a topknot, and I never will.


Oh, P.S. My really old iPod nano (which was my dad's before it was mine) got recalled, so Apple traded me for a new one and it is coooooooooool. I'm going to take the dog on a walk just to use it. I am a lucky kid.

Thursday, January 12, 2012


I'm only half kidding when I say page 38 is the coolest thing in my poetry portfolio.

Friday, January 6, 2012


  1. Play at the Slumber Party shows with Book on Tape Worm.
  2. Submit poetry to 5 publications.
  3. Give 20 things to charity. (24 down)
  4. Cook dinner for my family 5 times. (5 down)
  5. Teach Maren to touch one note on the piano at a time.
  6. Go to a Mexican Panedería with my dad.
  7. Drive to the Salton Sea.
  8. Visit St. George with some London friends. (CANCELLED!) Replacement: Record 10 songs for missonaries.
  9. See a movie at the Palm Springs International Film Festival.
  10. Finish making scarves.

P.S. My brother just walked into my closet and said "Well, time to go to the other dimension," and shut the door in front of himself.

P.P.S. Oh, you love Book on Tape Worm? Yeah, me too.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Hey, name two things I miss:

"This song is Copyrighted in U.S., under Seal of Copyright #154085, for a period of 28 years, and anybody caught singin' it without our permission, will be mighty good friends of ourn, cause we don't give a dern. Publish it. Write it. Sing it. Swing to it. Yodel it. We wrote it, that's all we wanted to do."

-Woody Guthrie, in the songbook for "Woody and Lefty Lou" listeners

Sunday, January 1, 2012

10 Things I Have Been Doing Lately.

  1. Getting a dog. Its name is Biko. (Courtesy of Dad.)
  2. Listening to Music for 18 Musicians by Reich.
  3. Reading Dubliners by James Joyce.
  4. Giving 50 things to DI.
  5. Editing poetry and writing in journals.
  6. Writing ideas and goals on my mirror.
  7. Looking at jobs and old pianos on Craigslist.
  8. Scribbling in charcoal. (Sometimes drawing).
  9. Reading the Book of Mormon for rhetorical devices.
  10. Winding up my snowglobe and watching Maren tip it over to figure out how it works.
Also, I'm playing at Velour this weekend with Book on Tape Worm. Come say hi.